July
21
2009
July
21
2009
July
19
2009
This car has a 1000 horsepower 16 cylinder engine and goes from zero to sixty in less than two seconds. It’s brakes will bring you to a complete stop in less time than that. It’s top speed is 253 mph. It’s interior is done up in leather from cows raised so high up in the Swiss Alps that there are no bugs to bite or sting the cows… This leaves the skins pristine. There will only be 300 made and 200 are already gone. Bugatti will be happy to take your deposit… That is if you’re a previous customer… And you don’t mind the car having over 250 test miles on it when you take delivery.
July
18
2009
This beast of a knife weighs about a kilogram or almost 2.75 pounds… And It’ll Only Cost You Around $800… But you get a display case! You’ll also need a pocket about 9 inches deep to carry it.
Here’s the specs…
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Corkscrew
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Wood Saw
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Nail File/Cleaner
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Reamer
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Scissors
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Toothpick and Tweezers
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Phillips Screwdriver
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Inside Wire Cutter
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Fish Scaler
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Fish Disgorger
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Golf Green Repairer
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Bottle Opener / Caplifter
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Can Opener
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Whistle
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Serrated lock blade
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Small phillips screwdriver
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Slip-joint pliers
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Wire crimper
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Outside wire cutter
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Bit holder
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2/3 serrated blade
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Semi-round nose pliers
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Wire cutter
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Nut wrench
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Integrated screwdrivers holder
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Phillips screwdriver bit 0
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Phillips screwdriver bit 1
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Phillips screwdriver bit 2
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Flat screwdriver bit 0.5 x 3.5
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Flat screwdriver bit 0.6 x 4.0
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Flat screwdriver bit 1.0 x 6.5
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Ruler cm/inch
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Bike chain rivet setter
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Multi-purpose detachable tool
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4mm curved hexagonal male key
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4 sided curved key
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10mm hexagonal key
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All purpose wrench
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Pen blade
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Round phillips screwdriver
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Special design blade
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Golf reamer
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Round pointed blade
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Combined tool – screwdriver, can opener, cap lifter
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Stud key golfer
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Hexagonal screwdriver 4mm
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Blade
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Special file
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Cigar cutting scissors
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Special screwdriver
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Special phillips screwdriver
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Ski wax scraper
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Magnifier
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Precision screwdriver
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Special shortix key
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Minathor toolbox with implements
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Metal file
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Metal saw
You can buy it HERE
July
15
2009
Q: What is the difference between medium and rare?
A: Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare.
Q.What is the difference between ‘ ooooooh‘and ‘ aaaaaaah‘?
A. About three inches.
Q. What do a Christmas tree and priests have in common?
A. Their balls are just for decoration.
Q. What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?
A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball
Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?
A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
Q. Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?
A. They don’t have balls to scratch.
July
15
2009
July
15
2009
July
15
2009
So what if he can’t spell…
July
15
2009
July
14
2009
One morning while making breakfast, a man walked up to his wife and pinched her on her butt and said, “You know if you firmed this up we could get rid of your girdle.”
While this was on the edge of intolerable, she thought herself better and replied with silence.
The next morning the man woke his wife with a pinch on the breast and said, “You know if you firmed these up we could get rid of your bra.”
This was beyond a silent response, so she rolled over and grabbed him by the penis. With a death grip in place she said, “You know if you firmed this up we could get rid of the postman, the gardener, the poolman and your brother.”
July
13
2009
July
13
2009
July
9
2009
Fox & Friend’s Brian Kilmeade… The Brown Haired No Eyebrow-ed One… Went off on a mindless burble about people marrying different “species” and making the races less pure… And all this came from talking about how married couples get less Alzheimer’s… His fellow hosts can’t believe what’s coming out of his pie-hole this time… Someone off camera even begins to whistle “If I Only Had A Brain”… Of course Brian also has stated that water buffalo have “skins as thick as leather.” Poor Guy!!!
As a person married to another “Species”… I should be offended… But I’m laughing too damn hard!!
Kilmeade’s attempt to express himself…
July
5
2009
