Mama’s Makin’ Wine… Now I Can Afford To Be A Wino…

The Mrs. Has Been Perfecting Her Winemaking Skills Over The Years…. She’s got six varieties of interesting little wines going.  I finally persuaded her to seriously bottle some with an eye towards getting some retail type folks to taste and test.


Puppy-Nose Wines

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Puppy-Nose Wines

Puppynose wine


It’s Not Something I’ve Wanted To Do… Until I Heard About The President And First Lady Doing It…

Not sure Mama’s gonna go for this one!!

Commit Mass Murder… Make The Bacon Explosion For All Your Friends…

Bacon-y.. Sausage-y… Barbecue-y… Crispy… Full Of Fat and Calories!.. What’s Not To Love??

The Bacon Explosion Is The Hottest Recipe Out There Thanks To These Guys And The New York Times

Take This…


Do This…


And Make This…


Find Out How … HERE

I’m Makin’ One This Weekend!…

Planning On Drinking a Lot For Super Bowl?… Take It Easy!!


Found On Craigslist… A Different Kind Of Personal Ad…

So, you’ve got a great job, a house, a car. Your friends are encouraging and supportive. Your family adores you. Dogs, cats, and children flock to you.

But, you’re just missing that little something. You just need a little more flavor. Something to keep you on your toes.

I’ve met your type before and I know just what you need.

I can provide you with a ration of anxiety attacks, sleep disturbances, and newfound paranoia. I am also willing to upset the most solid of friendships, anger your mother, and challenge your ability to keep your job. I can convince you that you are responsible for my well-being and, despite the havoc I leave in my wake, you will be inexplicably attracted to me.

I’m sure you’re wondering how I will accomplish this feat. That is not important. My undeniable sex appeal, charm, and natural talent for mayhem will not fail.

What you should be asking is why. Why would you want this? Well, you’ll be the first to admit that your comfortable life is getting quite dull. Once our courtship ensues you will have a renewed appreciation for the ho-hum. You’ll catch glimpses of the life you once had…casual drinks after work, football on Sundays, barbeques in the summertime…and though you’ll long for those days, you will feel wounded, crippled, unable to crawl back to that time. Eventually, though, I will feel you’ve had enough. I will leave you helpless, friendless, and so accustomed to my insatiable sex drive that you will continue to be isolated, frightened, and incapacitated in my absence. A ghost from your past life will find you, just before you turn to hard drugs to soothe your scarred psyche, and will nurse you back to emotional health.

This journey, this voyage will create a lifetime of unwavering appreciation for all of the things you had once thought to be dull. Food will taste better. Laughter will be more joyful. Warm human contact will be orgasmic. Plus, you will have an abundance of interesting stories to share with your loved ones. This experience may even lead to a new career as a motivational speaker.

Why am I willing to offer this life changing experience?

Well, frankly, I really need a good back rub right now.

The Old Man’s Ear…

Ear Infection

This is so true! They always ask at the doctor’s office why you are there, and you have to answer in front of others what’s wrong — and sometimes it is embarrassing.

There’s nothing worse than a doctor’s receptionist who insists you tell her what is wrong with you in a room full of other patients.
I know most of us have experienced this, and I love the way this old guy handled it:

A 65-year-old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached the desk.

The receptionist said, “Yes, sir, what are you seeing the doctor for today?”

He replied, “There’s something wrong with my dick.”

The receptionist became irritated and said, “You shouldn’t come into a crowded waiting room and say things like that.”

“Why not? You asked me what was wrong, and I told you.”

The receptionist replied, “Now y ou’ve caused some embarrassment in this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your ear and then discussed the problem further with the doctor in private.”

“You shouldn’t ask people questions in a room full of strangers if the answer could embarrass anyone,” the man said. Then he walked out and waited several minutes before re-entering.

The receptionist smiled smugly and said, “Yes?”

“There’s something wrong with my ear.”

The receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice. “And what is wrong with your ear, sir?”

“I can’t piss out of it.”

The waiting room erupted in laughter.

Mama Says I Look Like A Dick With My Head Shaved…


Some Advice For Mr. Obama From The Ol’ FourEyes…


Sometimes I Go Onto Extreme View Websites To Debate The Issues… It’s A Lot Like This…


But Sometimes!!!… YouTube Is Best…

youtube comments

Is This Irony?

A lawyer, was defending a man accused of sending obscene literature through the mail. Deciding to base his case on whether the material really was obscene, he asked court officials if he could see a copy…

So they mailed it to him.

Loyal LCO Reader Jenny B. Sends Lots of Cool Personality Links… Thanks!

Go Ahead! Find Out About YourSelf!!

Do You Have The Right Name?


What Are Your Lucky Numbers


Personality Test


Analyze Your Home Address


Analyze Your Phone Number


Is He Or She Compatible With You?


Analyze Your License Plate Number


Heck Of A Place To Hide A Wal-Mart Smiley…


I Don’t Care… I’m Eatin’ ‘Em Anyway!..

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Who Knew That Eggs Contained…. Eggs?!?!

allergic to eggs

It’s Amazing How Alcohol Can Make Everything Seem So Much Better…


A Few Sunday Morning Links… Enjoy!

78 degrees below zero in Alaska

Fat Strippers Popular In Russia

British May Launch Nukes After PM Dies

Diarrhea Drug Slows Aging

Visiting Family Warps Your Brain… Told You So!!!

How About A Bread Head?… Gruesome!


A Baker In Thailand Makes Heads… And Other Body Parts From Bread…

Book your Tour HERE


That Is One Very Cool Paint Job!…

plumbingtruck paintjob

According To #2 Son…” That’s Just Nasty!”

When you’ve got flies swarming your buttcrack… Do You want to be told?


CD Mouth…


Found In An Ancient Egyptian Pyramid… BatMan!


Make Sure You Check Your Machine… Very Bad Virus Set To Attack 9 Million Machines…

Don’t Know How Real This Is… But This Is From  The NEW YORK TIMES

From The New York Times…

A new digital plague has hit the Internet, infecting millions of personal and business computers in what seems to be the first step of a multistage attack. The world’s leading computer security experts do not yet know who programmed the infection, or what the next stage will be.

In recent weeks a worm, a malicious software program, has swept through corporate, educational and public computer networks around the world. Known as Conficker or Downadup, it is spread by a recently discovered Microsoft Windows vulnerability, by guessing network passwords and by hand-carried consumer gadgets like USB keys.


Many computer users may not notice that their machines have been infected, and computer security researchers said they were waiting for the instructions to materialize, to determine what impact the botnet will have on PC users. It might operate in the background, using the infected computer to send spam or infect other computers, or it might steal the PC user’s personal information.

Unraveling the program has been particularly challenging because it comes with encryption mechanisms that hide its internal workings from those seeking to disable it.


Computer security researchers expect that within days or weeks the bot-herder who controls the programs will send out commands to force the botnet to perform some as yet unknown illegal activity.

The worm has reignited a debate inside the computer security community over the possibility of eradicating the program before it is used by sending out instructions to the botnet that provide users with an alert that their machines have been infected.




Some Amazing 3D Sidewalk Art By Kurt Wenner…









If Your State Was A Country… U.S. States Renamed To Equal Countries With Similar GDP’s…

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if states were countries

America’s Song – Courtesy Of Oprah…