If you grew up in a generation before there was fast food, you may want to share some of these memories with your children or grandchildren. Just don’t blame me if they bust a gut laughing.
Growing up isn’t what it used to be, is it?
MEMORIES from a friend :
My Dad is cleaning out my grandmother’s house and he brought me an old Royal Crown Cola bottle. In the bottle top was a stopper with a bunch of holes in it.. I knew immediately what it was, but my daughter had no idea. She thought they had tried to make it a salt shaker or something. I knew it as the bottle that sat on the end of the ironing board to ‘sprinkle’ clothes with because we didn’t have steam irons. Man, I am old.
How many do you remember?
Head lights dimmer switches on the floor.
Ignition switches on the dashboard.
Heaters mounted on the inside of the fire wall.
Real ice boxes.
Pant leg clips for bicycles without chain guards.
Soldering irons you heat on a gas burner.
Using hand signals for cars without turn signals.
Older Than Dirt Quiz :
Count all the ones that you remember not the ones you were told about.
Ratings at the bottom.
1. Blackjack chewing gum
2.Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar water
3. Candy cigarettes
4. Soda pop machines that dispensed glass bottles
5. Coffee shops or diners with tableside juke boxes
6. Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard stoppers
7. Party lines on the telephone
8… Newsreels before the movie
9. P.F. Flyers
10. Butch wax
11. TV test patterns that came on at night after the last show and were there until TV shows started again in the morning. (there were only 3 channels [if you were fortunate])
13. Howdy Doody
14. 45 RPM records
15… S& H greenstamps
17. Metal ice trays with levers
18. Mimeograph paper
19. Blue flashbulbs
21. Roller skate keys
22. Cork popguns
25. Washing Machines with wringers
If you remembered 0-5 = You’re still young
If you remembered 6-10 = You are getting older
If you remembered 11-15 = Don’t tell your age,
If you remembered 16-25 = You’re older than dirt!
I might be older than dirt but those memories are some of the best parts of my life.
click to enlarge
A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost.
She reduced altitude and spotted a man below.
She descended a bit more and shouted, ‘Excuse me sir, can you help me?
I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago but
I don’t know where I am.’
The man below replied, ‘You’re in a hot air balloon hovering
approximately 30 feet above the ground.
You’re between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and
between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude.’
‘You must be an engineer,’ said the lady balloonist.
‘I am’, replied the man. ‘How did you know?’
‘Well, answered the balloonist, ‘everything you told me is
technically correct, but I’ve no idea what
to make of your information, and the fact is I’m still lost.
Frankly, you’ve not been much help to
me at all. If anything you’ve delayed my trip even more.’
The man below responded, ‘You must be in management.’
‘I am,’ replied the lady balloonist, ‘but, how did you know?’
‘Well,’ said the man, ‘You don’t know where you are, or where you’re going.
You have risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air within.
You made a promise, which you’ve no idea how to keep, and
you expect people beneath you, to solve your problems.’
- Some days you are the bug, some days you are the windshield.
- Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me, either. Just leave me the hell alone.
- The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.
- It’s always darkest before dawn, so if you’re going to steal your neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it.
- Don’t be irreplaceable. If you can’t be replaced, you can’t be promoted.
- No one is listening until you fart.
- Always remember you’re unique. Just like everyone else.
- Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
- It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a bad example.
- It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.
- If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
- Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile way and you have their shoes.
- If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
- Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish and he will sit in a boat & drink beer all day.
- If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
- Don’t squat with your spurs on.
- If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.
- Don’t worry, it only seems kinky the first time.
- Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
- The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it in your pocket.
- Timing has an awful lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.v
- A closed mouth gathers no foot.
- Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side & a dark side and it holds the universe together.
- There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.
- Generally speaking, you aren’t learning much when your mouth is moving.
- Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
- Never miss a good chance to shut up.
- We are born naked, wet, and hungry. Then things get worse.