For all those men who say, Why buy a cow when you can get milk for free. Here’s an update for you: Nowadays, 80% of women are against marriage, WHY? Because women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage.
MEN ARE LIKE…
1. Men are like Laxatives . They irritate the crap out of you.
2 Men are like. Bananas The older they get, the less firm they are.
3. Men are like Weather . Nothing can be done to change them.
4. Men are like Blenders You need One, but you’re not quite sure why.
5. Men are like Chocolate Bars .. Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.
6. Men are like Commercials . You can’t believe a word they say.
7. Men are like Department Stores … Their clothes are always 1/2 off!
8…. Men are like .. Government Bonds … They take soooooooo long to mature.
9. Men are like . Mascara . They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
10. Men are like Popcorn . They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
11. Men are like Snowstorms . You never know when they’re coming, how many inches you’ll get or how long it will last.
12. Men are like Lava Lamps . Fun to look at, but not very bright.
13. Men are like Parking Spots All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.
Males Are Born With A Built In Bra Meter…
He uses his head to keep the rain out of his neck.
She suffers from Clue Deficit Disorder.
It takes her an hour to cook minute rice.
The best part of him ran down his mother’s legs. — Jackie Gleason
There’s nothing wrong with you that couldn’t be cured with a little Prozac and a polo mallet.
She thinks E=MC² is a rap star.