Some Famous Last Words…

1. GEORGE APPEL (electrocuted in 1928)

As he was being strapped into the electric chair Appel quipped, ‘Well, folks, you’ll soon see a baked Appel.’

2. JESSE WALTER BISHOP (gassed in 1979)

The last man to die in Nevada’s gas chamber, Bishop’s final words were, ‘I’ve always wanted to try everything once . . . Let’s go!’

3. GUY CLARK (hanged in 1832)

On the way to the gallows the sheriff told Clark to speed up the pace. Clark replied, ‘Nothing will happen until I get there.’

4. JAMES DONALD FRENCH (electrocuted in 1966)

Turning to a newsman on his way to the electric chair, French helpfully suggested, ‘I have a terrific headline for you in the morning. “French Fries”.’

5. ROBERT ALTON HARRIS (gassed in 1992)

The last person to die in the gas chamber at San Quentin, Harris issued a final statement through the prison warden that stated, ‘You can be a king or a street-sweeper, but everybody dances with the Grim Reaper.’ The quote was inspired by a line from the film Bill and Ted’s Bogus Journey.

6. WILLIAM PALMER (hanged in 1856)

As he stepped onto the gallows Palmer looked at the trapdoor and exclaimed, ‘Are you sure it’s safe?’

7. SIR WALTER RALEIGH (beheaded in 1618)

Feeling the edge of the axe soon to be used on him, Raleigh said, ”Tis a sharp remedy but a sure one for all ills.’

8. JAMES W. RODGERS (shot in 1960)

Asked if he had a last request, Rodgers stated, ‘Why yes – a bulletproof vest.’

9. FREDERICK CHARLES WOOD (electrocuted in 1963)
Sitting down in the electric chair Wood said, ‘Gentlemen, you are about to see the effects of electricity upon wood.’

I Don’t Know… You Tell Me… I’m Stumped

Is Your Mom Or GrandMa In This Situation?

The Associated Press tells the tale of a woman who rented her phone rather than buy it. She rented it for a very long time, 42 years. Ultimately she paid $14,000 for the privilege! Her family recently discovered this and became angry. They put a stop to the rip-off and replaced her phone with a purchased, modern variety. The woman may never speak to them again, via phone or in person!

$14,000 is a lot of scratch unless you perform the simple mathematical operation of dividing it by 42 years. They don’t teach that in schools anymore! But doing it yields just $333 per year or $28 per month. Most kids pay double that rate for the privilege of a “FREE mobile phone” these days!

The AP reports, customers could have opted out of their leases in 1985 but almost a million people did not. A spokesman for “the phone company” says, “We will continue to lease sets as long as there is a demand for them.” And there are benefits to leasing like free replacements and newer models whenever a customer chooses.

The woman in question now has an extra few bucks each month but if her phone malfunctions, as all electronic gadgets do, she’ll have to wait for someone to drive her to the store, when it is convenient for them, so she can purchase a replacement. She better put her new savings into a lockbox! Oh, and by the way, the woman doesn’t care for the newfangled push-button phone. She says, “I’d like to have my rotary back. I like that better.”

I Am Definitely A GYNOTIKOLOBOMASSOPHILE… My Two Youngest Children Are HEBEPHRENIC… I Am A Big Fan Of LIBBERWORT… My Wife Constantly Accuses Me Of MEUPAREUNIA… And I Am Sometimes Guilty Of ONIOCHALASIA.

23 Obscure and Obsolete Words

The average adult recognizes 30,000 to 50,000 words, but only uses 10,000 to 15,000. However, there are actually about 1 million words in the English language, some of which – although obscure, forgotten, or rarely used – are worth reviving.

1. BOANTHROPY – A type of insanity in which a man thinks he is an ox.
2. CHANTEPLEURE – To sing and weep at the same time.
3. DIBBLE – To drink like a duck, lifting up the head after each sip.
4. EOSOPHOBIA – Fear of dawn.
5. EUGERIA – Normal and happy old age.
6. EUNEIROPHRENIA – Peace of mind after a pleasant dream.
7. EYESERVICE – Work done only when the boss is watching.
8. FELLOWFEEL – To crawl into the skin of another person so as to share his feelings, to empathise with.
9. GROAK – To watch people silently while they are eating, hoping they will ask you to join them.
10. GYNOTIKOLOBOMASSOPHILE – One who likes to nibble on a woman’s earlobes.
11. HEBEPHRENIC – A condition of adolescent silliness.
12. IATROGENIC – Illness or disease caused by doctors or by prescribed treatment.
13. LAPLING – Someone who enjoys resting in women’s laps.
14. LIBBERWORT – Food or drink that makes one idle and stupid, food of no nutritional value, `junk food’.
15. MEUPAREUNIA – A sexual act gratifying to only one participant.
16. NEANIMORPHIC – Looking younger than one’s years.
17. ONIOCHALASIA – Buying as a means of mental relaxation.
18. PARNEL – A priest’s mistress.
19. PERISTEROPHOBIA – Fear of pigeons.
20. PILGARLIC – A bald head that looks like a peeled garlic.
21. PREANTEPENULTIMATE – Fourth from last.
22. RESISTENTIALISM – Seemingly spiteful behaviour manifested by inanimate objects.
23. SUPPEDANEUM – A foot support for crucifix victims.

If You Visit This Site Using Explorer for Windows…

I just today got a look at the site using Windows XP and Explorer and it looked like crap!!

This is what it should look like… note the calendar on the sidebar!.. Click the image to see full size.

I build the site using a Mac and Firefox… And I take pride in making it look presentable.

So if you see that the site looks crappy on your browser… Please drop me a line at:

thefoureyes@earthlink.net

I recommend using Firefox or Safari to view LCO … But I’ll make more of an effort to check how things look with Explorer.

Just in case you’d like to check out Firefox… You can get it (HERE)

Obama And Cheney Related… WTF?!?

Yeech!

OK… So Barack Obama is a blood relative of Dick Cheney. There… I’ve written it. And I didn’t puke onto my keyboard. Although I did have to throw a way a perfectly good McGriddle sandwich when I first contemplated commenting on it… When I first heard this… I thought… Those GOP’ers have gone one toke over the line… They must be high! … But it’s apparently true. I’ll bet Barack needs to toke on something right about now.

This throws a serious monkey wrench into my voting strategy… See… I convinced myself that the Democratic ticket will be Clinton/Obama… And I was good with that. This registered Independent had put the election to bed in his poor fevered mind.

Now.

Maybe not so much.

I like Hillary… More so because we kind of get Bill back when she’s elected than anything else… But she’s smart and capable on her own too. But I decided long ago that Obama lacks a bit in the experience department for the top job just yet… But with eight years as V.P. under his belt?.. Well … Yeah. And he was a great back up candidate as far as I was concerned … You know… Just in case the “vast right wing conspiracy” finds a way to sink Hillary… An Obama / Richardson ticket would have worked for me too.

But now… All kinds of crazy stuff flies through my mind about this poor guy. First and foremost… Pure D sympathy! It’s bad enough that he’s got to put up with dumb sh*t like people questioning whether he’s black enough… And that his middle name is Hussein. But related to Dick “Shotgun” Cheney?!? That may win him Iowa… But 99% of Dems are headed for the hills! Hillary has got to be looking real hard at Bill Richardson now. And anybody asking about Obama having a tail might get a pass on the racial tip after this.

You gotta feel sorry for Barack though… He just found out that in all likelihood… He’s related to Beelzebub himself… How do you explain to your wife that your cute little daughters might develop cloven hoofs at puberty? Poor Michelle! How is she supposed to handle the possibility that future family reunions could include the Lord of the Flies, Sauron, Baal, (Tlaloc), (Moloch), Lord Voldemort and Granpa Satan? What the hell do you put on that buffet table? Puppy fritters? Kitten tenders?.. She’s definitely gonna need this recipe for (baby soup) . (WARNING-!! THIS IS VERY VERY GROSS AND GRAPHIC!)

Damn.

One night you go to bed and you’re seriously in the running to be the next POTUS… And you wake up to find that Ol’ Scratch Himself is most likely your great granddaddy… Beelzebub is your cousin and you might be the AntiChrist… Talk about a buzzkill… Unless Hussein is Arabic for Damien.

We Just Might Survive Being Subjugated By China After All.

Some people might call me a waffle-er… And I still feel that we are at very high risk of falling under the thumb of certain nations because we’ve traded away our industrial capacity… But this sure deserves a look see.

I’m watching PBS about fast food taking over the world and the resultant explosion in heart disease and other illnesses related to eating the supersized overfatted deepfried glop that we’ve been eating for years.

We Americans are used to eating this crap… We’re fat bastards and proud of it… But… Studies have shown that the Chinese and other Asian nations are suffering already from eating stuff that we Americans consider staple foods.

In other words… They’re as vulnerable to the saturated fats and carbohydrates as badly as the Indians of the Americas were to the European diseases the English and Spanish brought over with them!

They can’ t handle trans fats and high carbs from a genetic standpoint!.. And they haven’t even reached anywhere near the saturation point for McDonald’s, KFC and Pizza Huts… Mickey D’s is opening a store a day in mainland China…. God help them… They don’t stand a chance.

I guess Rampant Capitalism will wind up killing us all in one way or another… Can you imagine half a billion people with diabetes, clogged arteries, sky high cholesterol and blood pressure all jonesing for a #5 supersized?.. This could happen within 20 years… I wonder if there’ll be a detectable earthquake when 250 million fat Chinese all fall over with massive coronaries?

Here’s an excerpt from another article:

Across the Far East, growing urbanization, rapid industrialization and increasing obesity associated with decreased physical activity is fueling an epidemic that has killed as many as Aids but has received a fraction of the attention.

The disease is diabetes, and its incidence is accelerating around the world. From 170 million affected in 2000, doctors predict the total will rise to 370 million by 2025, leading to an epidemic of amputations and blindness, the two commonest effects of the condition. Developing nations will be hardest hit; they bear 90 per cent of the burden but have only 10 per cent of the resources to deal with it.

Doctors do not know why Asians are more prone to the disease. One theory is that because of their slighter build, compared with Westerners, they have less muscle bulk and more fat, so do not need to gain much weight to put themselves at risk. Malnourishment in infancy or in the womb, which is known to increase the risk of diabetes, may also play a part. Seven out of 10 of the worst affected nations by the disease are in Asia. India already has a total of 31 million cases, the highest in the world, closely followed by China with 20 million. The Far East is expected to see the fastest growth by 2025, with a near doubling in the current total of 81 million cases to 156 million. (READ MORE)

Maybe if the Chinese threaten to withhold our cheap goods… Our corporate Masters will threaten to withhold the supply of high fructose corn syrup.

Diabolical.

posted by TheFourEyes

The End Of The American Era… Or… Why Chinese Needs To Be Mandatory In All Of Our Schools.

I’ve been watching Ken Burn’s “War” series on PBS for a couple of weeks and a thought struck me like a thunderbolt.

We (the allies) won the Second World War largely due to this one unmistakable fact…

We out manufactured our opponents.

America used its enormous capacity to manufacture pleasure goods and necessities and all the things that made being an American so desirable.

TV’s and radios and razors and rubber ducks… Cars and cables and cans and tires. We had no trouble filling the shelves of Sears and Woolworth’s and Macy’s and every Five and Dime store on every corner of every town in this country and we still had enough capacity to export our surplus all over the world. Our manufacturing capacity was so strong that we barely had use for any of our own scrap material. We sold tons of it cheaply to the Japanese thinking how clever we were to be getting rid of the stuff. The Japanese wrote the checks for the stuff and eventually returned it to us by dropping it on our heads at Pearl Harbor.

This little incident served to stir up the carefree and hedonistic giant that was America enough to immediately begin turning it’s fantastical capacity to make or build any and everything that could be used to make life easier and / or more pleasurable… over to the capacity to damage, destroy, kill and generally make miserable the source of it’s irritation.

By the time America’s manufacturing machine got revved up… we were building ships, planes, guns, jeeps, trucks, bombs, radios, raincoats, shoes, and submarines faster than the enemy could destroy them. And not only were we making enough for ourselves… we supplied England and Russia as well. We made so much stuff that you could still find WWII surplus stuff well into the 1980’s.

That’s why we’re still the world leader… right? … We’re still king of the hill in the manufacturing capacity game and if anybody messes with us… we’ll turn on that vaunted manufacturing machine again and rain down destruction and woe upon our enemies… Right?

In a word …

Nope.

We couldn’t manufacture our way to a decent surrender ceremony if we faced a threat of even a fraction of what we faced in WWII. If any country with a decent military and a real manufacturing capacity came after us… We’d be fighting our way out of an occupation with no guarantee that we’d get all of our territory back without a very, very concerted and time consuming effort.

Example: We’ve been at war in Iraq and Afghanistan for four years and our troops still don’t have sufficient gear to protect them nor carry the fight where it needs to go either in intensity or capacity. And even though Iraq and the Taliban were well armed… these are only bush league ( pun intended) countries that couldn’t have out fought the State of Connecticut in its WWII heyday. Our generals are already screaming that we’re at the breaking point and that it would be suicidal to go after Iran.

So… What would we do if we got into a disagreement with a nation or group of nations that could be considered 2nd world or better? Say… Brazil or North Korea or India or China or Russia or even Iran? Could we handle any one of these countries without resorting to the nuclear option? I don’t think so.

I suspect that if we didn’t resort to nukes… China or Russia could invade North America through Canada and take all of Canada west of the Mississippi and the American states of Alaska, Washington, Oregon, Idaho, Montana, Wyoming, North and South Dakota and Minnesota as well as a good bit of northern California before we could mount a decent defense.

But… I don’t think we’ll have to worry about a ground war here on American soil… Why? Because this nation is already subservient to the power of a communist nation.

Preposterous! You say… Wanna bet?… Go out and try to find a way to live your life without Chinese made goods … You won’t get very far unless you are among the very rich. And to add insult to injury… They know it and don’t try to hide it.

Your car? Remember you used to grouse that all the parts were made in Mexico?.. Think again… Need a new cell phone? Even the iPhone is made in China.

If our government doesn’t kiss the feet of the Chinese rulers… Inside of a year… You will be walking shoeless through the aisles of a near empty Wal-Mart hoping that you can find a shirt from Honduras that wasn’t made on Chinese sewing machines. But you won’t walk far due to the effects of the various poisons you ingested over the past year in your seafood, medicines and toothpaste. Of course the fact that your pets died recently from food poisoning will tend to have a negative affect on your morale also.

Sure.. We’ll muddle by for a year or so on the stockpiles of stuff already here… But prices will skyrocket as supplies dwindle… And even if you manage to baby your cell phone through a couple of years… There’s no guarantee that the network it runs on will survive due to the fact that all of the switches that make up the network are either manufactured in whole or contain a significant number of parts made in China…. Ouch!

Our whiz bang weapon systems that companies like Raytheon and Boeing are cranking out?… how much you wanna bet that the chips that make them do everything including go bang are made in Asia? Most people can count 200 items in their house with made in China labels without breaking a sweat… I can count 50 items without moving from my desk. Now count how many of those items you can or care to live without?

Wanna talk about your car?.. I didn’t think so.

I’m banging away at this essay on a Mac that was designed in California but made in China… The Dell laptop was assembled in the USA though… out of mostly Chinese parts…. Bluetooth?.. USB?… Firewire?… Surge protector?… Full spectrum low energy compact florescent light bulb?… My fancy Logitech 5.1 surround sound speakers?!?… MY FRUIT OF THE LOOMS!!!!??? The ones with the comfort band and no itchy label?!?

Ditto.

Our corporate masters… driven by our greed for easy profits have sold the very strength of America right out from under our noses with nary a thought of the future consequences. The very rich will adapt quite readily to the expense of living without the cheap goods… They always have. But the average family will suffer mightily… To the point of death in many cases.

So… without firing a shot or risking one soldier’s life… The Communist People’s Republic of China has fulfilled Khrushchev’s promise that communism would bury capitalism.

In the name of the almighty dollar… Our children will live in a world where they are vassals to a stronger nation.

And here’s the irony… Even if we chose to put our nation back into a position where we could make our own stuff again… Guess where we’d have to buy the technology to do so from?

Sigh.

Posted by TheFourEyes

Thailand’s King Bhumibol Adulyadej’s Health Improving…

You may remember that I asked for your good thoughts and wishes for Thailand’s King HERE

LCO would like to thank you… Here is an update as of 10/16/07:

Windsor Genova – AHN News Writer
Bangkok, Thailand (AHN) – Royal doctors on Tuesday said the condition of Thailand’s King Bhumibol Adulyadej has improved.

According to Bangkok Post, the news relieved thousands of the king’s supporters, who have flocked to the Siriraj Hospital in Bangkok. The 79-year-old king was taken to the hospital on Saturday after feeling weak.

The royal doctors released a statement saying that reduced blood flow caused the right side of the king’s body to weaken. They said the right side has returned to its normal strength and the king is able to sit in a chair to eat meals.

The doctors said they have advised the king to make more body movements to strengthen his muscles, the Thai News Agency said.

The results of blood tests on the king are also satisfactory, according to his doctors.

Meanwhile, well-wishers at the hospital on Tuesday signed books that wish for the speedy recovery of the king, who is revered by Thais.

The Grumpy Old Bitches Offer A Take On Grown Kids At Home…

Why Women Eat Their Young:

There are five hung over people in my basement.

One is son.

Two are son’s friends.

Two are son’s friends’ girlfriends.

It’s okay to be hung over in my basement.

It is not okay to wake me up in the wee hours while you are striving for the hangover.

It is not okay to spill your beer on my sofa. No, not even if you’re that pity-inducing sort of girl whose eye-black looks more NFL than Avril Lavigne because you got a little weepy after you puked noisily in my bathroom and came out at three in the morning to be asked, “Who the hell are you and why are you puking in my bathroom?”

READ MORE

Properly Pronounced English… Merican Style.

• Bar: To take temporarily. “May I bar your eraser?”
• Dense: A tooth expert. “Yuck!  I have a dense appointment today.”
• Forced: A large cluster of trees. “Only you can prevent forced fires.”
• Lays:  The opposite of genmen. “Lays and genmen,…”
• Lining:  Electrical flash of light.  “We abandoned our picnic when we heard the thunder and saw the lining.”
• Mere:  A reflecting glass. “Mere, mere on the wall…”
• Mince:  Unit of time (60 sec.). “I’ll be back in a few mince.” 
• Money:  Second day of the week. “I’ll be back next Money.“
• Neck Store: Adjacent “I’m in love with the girl neck store.”
• Please: Officer(s) of the law.  “My house was robbed, call the please.” 
• Sunny:  The first day of the week. “When Sunny comes, can Money be far behind?” 
• Then:   A conjunction “I like Sunny better then Money.”
• Winner: The cold season of the year “Many birds fly south for the winner.”

Poor Bill…

Bill worked in a pickle factory. He had been employed there for a number of years when he came home one day to confess to his wife that he had a terrible compulsion. He had an urge to stick his penis into the pickle slicer.

His wife suggested that he should see a sex therapist to talk about it, but Bill indicated that he’d be too embarrassed. He vowed to overcome the compulsion on his own.

One day a few weeks later, Bill came home absolutely ashen. His wife could see at once that something was seriously wrong. “What’s wrong, Bill?” she asked.

“Do you remember that I told you how I had this tremendous urge to put my penis into the pickle slicer?” “Oh,Bill, you didn’t.” “Yes, I did.” “My God, Bill, what happened?” “I got fired.” “No, Bill. I mean, what happened with the pickle slicer?

“Oh…she got fired too.”

I Swear I Did This Same Thing As A Kid!

Therefore… Viewing this picture has caused me great stress and embarrassment that can only be subsumed by the consumption of a moderately large quantity of alcohol…

Good Thing It’s Friday!!!

All Hail Mona “The Hammer” Shaw For Striking A Blow To The Villanous BBB’s!! (Big Business Bastards)

Taking a Whack Against Comcast
Mona Shaw Reached Her Breaking Point, Then for Her Hammer
By Neely Tucker
Washington Post Staff Writer
Thursday, October 18, 2007; C01

“What the hell, I’m 75,” said Bristow resident Mona Shaw about heading into the Comcast office in Manassas with a hammer and using it on a telephone and computer keyboard, after trying for days to have her phone service connected.

Sometimes truly American virtues arise in outlaws who — by dint of heroic but questionable endeavors — display the mettle of the national character.

For instance: The Dillinger Gang, robbing banks (and destroying mortgages) when banks were foreclosing on the poor. Stephanie St. Clair, matron of the numbers racket during the Harlem Renaissance, striking a (dubious) blow for both gender and racial equality. Junior Johnson bootlegging liquor during Prohibition (the benefits of which were self-evident).

Fear not, fellow Americans! In these dark days of war, pestilence and Paris Hilton, a new hero has arisen. She is none other than 75-year-old Mona “The Hammer” Shaw, who took the aforementioned implement to her local Comcast office in Manassas to settle a score, and boy, did she! (READ MORE)

Famous Fat People

Galen, a first century Roman physician, reported meeting Nichomachus of Smyrna – a man who was so heavy that he could not move nor be moved from his bed. Other ancient texts cite the case of an unnamed Roman senator who was only able to walk when two slaves carried his belly for him, and another yarn of an Egyptian pharaoh whose belly was broader than the ‘span of a man’s outstretched arms’.

The Dutch physician Hermann Boerhaave once observed a man who took his meals at a table that ‘had been cut away in a semicircle to accommodate his circumference’. Furthermore the man ‘not having slaves to help him, used a sling worn around his shoulders to carry his belly’.

In 1889, an attempt was made to put a young French woman in Plaisance on exhibit. It was said that ‘eight men could not move her from her room’. As it turned out, she couldn’t fit through the door and the idea of exhibition was abandoned.

AND FURTHERMORE :

On March 13, 1770 a man was born in Leicester in England whose name would enter into the English language to be synonymous with colossal. Daniel Lambert was a fairly rotund man in his youth; healthy and stout. He was of average height and born unto average parents, he had two sisters and a younger brother – all of whom were average as well. He was an active man and unusually strong. At the age of 20, as his mass started to grow – he consciously remained active and watched his diet. However, in the 1790’s Daniel took over his father’s position as keeper of Leicester prison – and took up a stationary lifestyle. In 1793, he weighed 448 pounds – in a time when the greatest weight ever medically recorded in England was around 616 pounds. Despite his weight, Lambert was still quite strong and showed little sign of fatigue as he gave swimming and hunting lessons. However, his weight continued and in 1801, at 560 pounds, he could no longer hunt, his horse simply could not bear his weight. In 1805, his prison closed down and, after a brief time as a recluse and ballooning to a legitimate 700 pounds, he took to exhibiting himself for profit.

Lambert was an exceptionally bright man, possessed of a razor wit and while most came to see him out of interest and respect – he did have to deal with the occasional heckler. His retorts were legendary. On one particular occasion an obnoxious fellow was persistent and adamant in knowing the cost of Lamberts waistcoat – a rather rude question in that era – when Lambert politely refused to answer the question the heckler remarked that since he had paid a shilling (the cost of admission) toward the cost of the coat, he had a right to demand any information about it. ‘Sir,’ replied Lambert, ‘I can assure you that if I knew what part of my coat your shilling would pay for, I would cut out that piece.’

During his lifetime, Lambert was the subject of many writings including the Medical and Physical Journal, countless flyers, newspapers and caricatures and even appeared in the Memoirs of Charles Mathews (a popular actor of the era). He rubbed elbows with the affluent in influential of the time. He met King George III, visiting officers of Napoleon, royalty, ambassadors and even an elderly Josef Boruwlaski – certainly a stunning meeting as the biggest man of that time met the smallest.

When Lambert died in 1808, still in relative good health except for nagging knees, he weighed in at 739 pounds. His waist measured 9 feet and 4 inches. He was immensely popular due to his wit and easy going nature. People were in awe of not only his size, but of his spirit as well. Many regarded him as a true jovial, gentle giant – a reputation that would carry to the big jolly sideshow men and women who would follow in his ample shoes for decades.

Following his death, Lambert was featured in his own biography: The Life of that Wonderful and Extraordinary Heavy Man, the late Daniel Lambert. He was also featured in Granger’s Wonderful Museum and Magazine Extraordinary, Smeeton’s Biographia Curiosa. He is referred to in great novels like Barry Lyndon, Vanity Fair and even Charles Dickenson’s Nicholas Nickleby. Lambert’s popularity even spread to America following his death as P.T. Barnum displayed a wax version of Lambert, dressed in a suit of clothing purchased from the Lambert estate. During Barnum’s museum fire of 1865 – the wax representation was fittingly too heavy to rescue.

It was also Dickens who, in his magazine Household Words forever cemented the name Daniel Lambert with hugeness. Even today, there are numerous Pubs, Taverns and Inns named after Lambert – with the keepers hoping the clientele will associate the name with ample portions of food and drink. Oddly enough, Lambert likely suffered from a pituitary obesity – he reputedly never ate a large meal or drank beer.

The Mountainous Human Marvel is all but gone now, with only one Fat Man, Howard Huge, still traveling. The obese are no longer looked upon in wonder, interest and awe – rather with disgust and insensitivity. In fact just a few short years ago, at St. Martin’s churchyard in Stamford, someone spray-painted the word FATTY on Lambert’s tombstone.

Adapted from the book The Two Headed Boy by Jan Bondeson .

Monkey to Human Testicle Transplant!!

A surgeon by the name of Serge Voronoff, will live on in medical infamy for performing transplants which, while at the time (late 1800s) were lauded as genius, would eventually disgrace him.

Voronoff’s hypothesis was this: hormones, like testosterone produced by the testes, would reverse aging by a process he called “rejuvenation.” One of his first experiments used himself as a test subject. He injected ground up dog and guinea pig testicles under his own skin, but was disappointed when this did not result in any verifiable effect. He reasoned that living grafts of testicular tissue, rather than injections, would have a more dramatic and lasting rejuvenation effect. (READ MORE)

My Father Sent This…

How Much LSD Does It Take to Kill an Elephant?

Who in their right mind would give a huge dose of a psychotropic substance to an elephant, just to see what happened? Well, the year was 1962, and someone did just that. And, as icing on the cake, they got a Science paper out of it.

The Experiment

The subject was a 14-year-old male Indian elephant named Tusko being housed at the Lincoln Park Zoo. As previous research had suggested that high doses to LSD were needed to get perceivable effects in “lower animals,” they decided to start with a 0.1 mg/kg dose of LSD for Tusko. That came to about 297 milligrams (in 5 mL of water, injected intramuscularly) of LSD for 7000 pound Tusko. The injection was delivered via a pressurized CO2 dart gun. For comparison, the threshold dosage for an effect in people is around 20-30 micrograms and a recreational 3+ hour dose would be around 100-200 micrograms.  (READ MORE)

Courtesy of Retrospectacle

Shelley Batts is the author of Retrospectacle and a Neuroscience PhD candidate at the University of Michigan. She studies hair cell regeneration in the cochlea, and is just embarking on that quixotic quest called ‘thesis.’ She lies awake at night pondering how science intersects with politics, culture, policy, money, medicine, and religion in an attempt to be more than just a niche scientist sitting in the oh-so-lovely ivory tower.

You can vote for her to get a scholarship HERE 

On the Origin of Grandmas

They pinch your cheeks, knit you sweaters and feed you mountains of mashed potatoes. Is that why you’re still alive?

According to a 1997 survey from the American Journal of Sociology, fewer than 60% of U.S. women live within an hour’s drive of their parents, meaning that many grandparents have been relegated to matters of vacations, Christmases and birthday cards.

This peripheral role of grandparents is a relatively new phenomenon – especially for grandmothers. For thousands of years grandmothers helped with child care, domestic chores, even food gathering. In fact, anthropologists have argued that the effect of grandmotherly care on child survival was so potent that it shaped some of our most basic biology: menopause, cognitive decline, even longevity itself.

These evolutionary benefits of grandmothering evaporate when grandmas no longer live with (or near) their grandchildren. Studies have also suggested that only youthful grandparents provide discernible benefits to child health. So as the distance between grandparents and children grows, both in geography and in age, does this spell the end to the grandmother effect?  READ MORE

Let’s See Uncle Annie Get Out Of This One!

Ann Coulter on CNBC Show: Jews Need ‘Perfecting’

Appearing on Donny Deutsch’s CNBC show, “The Big Idea,” on Monday night, columnist/author Ann Coulter suggested that the U.S. would be a better place if there weren’t any Jewish people and that they had “perfected” themselves into — Christians.

It led Deutsch to suggest that surely he couldn’t mean that, and when she insisted she did, he said this sounded “anti-Semitic.”

Check Out This Video Of Antagonistic Annie HERE

10-12 (CNN) Author Anne Coulter has raised more than a few eyebrows with her latest remarks. During an interview with CNBC, the columnist and author made a comment about jews. Carol Costello has the story.

And this thing calls itself a “practicing christian”… You know what gives me brain farts?… Trying to picture this thing anywhere on a Sunday morning except crawling out of some basement tranny bar in Soho smelling like sweat, cigarettes and bathroom spritz machine Jean Nate´.

Is this creature representative of Christianity’s mainstream now?.. My shaky commitment to the organized religion of my ancestors is even more in doubt if that’s the case… At any rate… I happen to like my Jewish friends in their “un-perfected” state just fine… I look forward to the day Annie finally… on some tv show no less… falls down foaming at the mouth and biting herself… And I hope her “All Occasion” li’l black dress hikes up to show the world her “biggest secret”. There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that this undead creature is the love slave of Dick Cheney and sleeps hanging upside down from the rafters of the “undisclosed bunker.”

Somebody… please put this rabid ferret out of my misery!

MY ODE TO ANN COULTER:

That Ann-I-Am, that Ann-I-Am… I do not like that Ann-I-Am!

And I would put her in a box and I would make her eat some Lox.

And I would throw her from a plane and hope she lands before a train.

The loot she rakes in from her books… She doesn’t use to fix her looks.

She only owns that one black dress…It’s old! It reeks!… It’s such a mess!

She spews such hate, such filth, such slime… Her 15 minutes!.. It’s almost time.

If I could have one wish to pick… To see… if “she”… does have…a D**k!

Daily Goodies Page

If You’ve Got A Daughter… Maybe You Should Take A Peek Over Here.

About Face’s mission is to equip women and girls  with tools to understand and resist harmful media images that affect self-esteem and body image.

READ MORE HERE 

Would Gay Marriage Solve This Problem?

Aging and Gay, and Facing Prejudice in Twilight

Bruce Steiner, 76, left, helped feed his partner, Jim Anthony, 71, who has Alzheimer’s disease.

Even now, at 81 and with her memory beginning to fade, Gloria Donadello recalls her painful brush with bigotry at an assisted-living center in Santa Fe, N.M. Sitting with those she considered friends, “people were laughing and making certain kinds of comments, and I told them, ‘Please don’t do that, because I’m gay”…

The result of her outspokenness, Ms. Donadello said, was swift and merciless. “Everyone looked horrified,” she said. No longer included in conversation or welcome at meals, she plunged into depression. Medication did not help. With her emotional health deteriorating, Ms. Donadello moved into an adult community nearby that caters to gay men and lesbians. (READ MORE)

Today’s Insults –

“Don’t look out of the window… People will think that it’s Halloween” – Alice F. from MI

With the skimpy clothes she wears she couldn’t even hide her embarrassment. – Auntie

“He’s as gay as pink ink” – anonymous

“As confused as a blind lesbian in a fish market” - unknown

“She needs the rough end of a pineapple shoved up her arse” – anon

Remember me saying that there are some obituaries that I look forward to reading?… Here’s One…

Prosecutor jailed on child sex charges commits suicide

J.D. Roy Atchison, the federal prosecutor from Florida who was jailed two weeks ago after allegedly flying to Detroit to have sex with a child, committed suicide, authorities said today.

He hanged himself this morning at the federal prison in Milan, where he was taken after trying to commit suicide last month at Sanilac County Jail, authorities said.

Officials said Atchison, 53, of Gulf Breeze, Fla., had been housed in solitary confinement and was under close supervision, adding that he had shown no signs of despondency. (READ MORE)

Federal Prosecutor Arrested In Child Sex Sting

See Video Here

Lawyer of the Day: John David R. Atchison

And it gets worse:

The detective, acting as the child’s mother, allegedly arranged a sexual encounter between Atchison and her 5-year-old daughter, police said….The undercover detective expressed concern about physical injury to the 5-year-old girl as a result of the sexual activity. Detectives said Atchison responded, ” I am always gentle and loving; not to worry, no damage ever, no rough stuff ever. I only like it soft and nice.”