We’re Cutting Your Social Security Check… Not If She Can Help It!!
NSFW… Language… NSFW
This lady takes no guff from ANYONE!
Listen HERE
Cool Stuff, Jokes, Just Plain Silly | TheFourEyes May 6, 2008 | 
Comments (0)
The Preacher Is Leaving…
A Preacher was explaining that he must move on to a larger congregation that will pay him more.
There is a hush within the congregation. No one wants him to leave.
Joe Smith, who owns several car dealerships in the City stands up and proclaims, ‘If the Preacher stays, I will provide him with a new Cadillac every year and his wife with a Honda mini-van to transport their children!’
The congregation sighs in relief and applauds.
Sam Brown, a successful entrepreneur and investor, stands and says ‘If the Preacher will stay on here… I’ll personally double his salary and also establish a foundation to guarantee the college education of all his children!’
More sighs and loud applause.
Sadie Jones, age 88, stands and announces with a smile, ‘If the Preacher stays, I will give him sex!’
There is total silence.
The Preacher, blushing, asks her ‘Mrs. Jones, whatever possessed you to say that?’
Sadie’s 90 year old husband Jake is now trying to hide, holding his forehead with the palm of his hand and shaking his head from side to side, while his wife replies…
‘Well, I just asked my husband how we could help and he said ‘Screw the Preacher!’
Don’t You Just Hate Days Like This?
Which Guy Does She Love More?
Hell… When You Got Him Like This… Why Shoot Him… Just Play.. “This Little Piggy Went To Market…”
When Does That Expire?…
I Wrote About The Expire Date For Pickles And Other Household Products Back In December 2007
I recently came across a TABLE OF CONDIMENTS courtesy of the mysterious people(?) at F.N.O.R.D.,
New Photos Of The Hiroshima Atomic Bombing Aftermath… Very Graphic.
These 10 Pictures were taken by an unknown Japanese photographer and were found in 1945 among rolls of undeveloped film in a cave outside Hiroshima by U.S. serviceman Robert L. Capp, who was attached to the occupation forces… Unlike most photos of the Hiroshima bombing, these dramatically convey the human as well as material destruction unleashed by the atomic bomb and were apparently taken very shortly after the bomb was dropped.
WARNING…WARNING… EXREMELY GRAPHIC… DO NOT CLICK THUMBNAILS IF YOU OBJECT!!!
A companion book By Sean Malloy is available at Amazon
“I came across these will research my recent book on the bomb, Atomic Tragedy,” he tells DANGER ROOM. “They were found in a cave outside Hiroshima by a U.S. serviceman who was part of the occupation forces. We have no information about who took the photos, what became of him/her, or why the photos ended up in a cave. The serviceman held onto to them in his personal collection until 1998, when he donated them to the Hoover Archives [at Stanford University] with the provision that they not be reproduced until 2008. I included three of these photos in my book, but I wanted to make them all publicly available.”
Cool Pics, Information, Uncategorized | TheFourEyes May 5, 2008 |
Comments (0)
I Guess It’s Time To Do Some Yardwork*…
Not really my yard*
I let It Go a Little Too Far Last Year*…
*not really my yard
I Don’t Want To Be Singled Out Like This Lady….
A WOMAN has been evicted for letting weeds and brambles in her garden grow so high they can be seen from space on Google Earth.
View from above … satellite picture
*Mama says if I don’t put up this disclaimer that none of these are pics of my yard… My life will not be worth 10 pennies.
Nice Guns… Can You Tell Which Is Real And Which Is Fake?
Hello Kitty Has Graduated To Guns
The Top Pistol Is The Only Fake Gun Shown… Read More HERE and HERE and HERE
The other cell phones are stun guns
See a video of the Cell Phone Gun In Action
Welcome Back… Like The New Theme?
The old theme was giving me trouble with the archives and categories… And besides… This new theme is more energy efficient
… It seems that black backgrounds consume much less energy… Makes sense though… Your monitor doesn’t have to light up all those pixels.
Anyway… I may keep fiddling until I find something that works at least 99%… But in the mean time… When you go to the “Categories” and “Archives”… Most of them show up now.
Comments Are Open… Let Me Know What You Think.
Uncategorized | TheFourEyes May 4, 2008 |
Comments (0)
Do Your Electronics Have A “Kill Switch” Buried In Them?… Or Worse?
Can the Government Shut Down Your Computer And Cell Phone Just By Broadcasting A Signal?
Even worse… could our military be crippled by off the shelf electronics made in foreign countries that have secret “Trojan Horse” software built in?
There’s a growing worry at the Pentagon and within government circles that millions of computers, cell phones and other vital electronic controllers have been compromised by having secret backdoor software embedded into the chips that are largely manufactured overseas.
There are stories circulating that the Israeli strike at the suspected Syrian nuclear facility last September… Word is that the state of the art Syrian antiaircraft radar simply didn’t work… Is this an example of the new electronic warfare?
IEEE Spectrum says that the Pentagon is now seriously rethinking it’s reliance on foreign made chips… Something that it puts into it’s weapon systems by the thousands:
” The dwindling of domestic chip and electronics manufacturing in the United States, combined with the phenomenal growth of suppliers in countries like China, has only deepened the U.S. military’s concern. ”
“Recognizing this enormous vulnerability, the DOD recently launched its most ambitious program yet to verify the integrity of the electronics that will underpin future additions to its arsenal. In December, the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA), the Pentagon’s R&D wing, released details about a three-year initiative it calls the Trust in Integrated Circuits program. The findings from the program could give the military-and defense contractors who make sensitive microelectronics like the weapons systems for the F‑35-a guaranteed method of determining whether their chips have been compromised. In January, the Trust program started its prequalifying rounds by sending to three contractors four identical versions of a chip that contained unspecified malicious circuitry. The teams have until the end of this month to ferret out as many of the devious insertions as they can.”
“But these days, the U.S. military consumes only about 1 percent of the world’s integrated circuits. “Now,” says Coleman, “all they can do is buy stuff.” Nearly every military system today contains some commercial hardware. It’s a pretty sure bet that the National Security Agency doesn’t fabricate its encryption chips in China. But no entity, no matter how well funded, can afford to manufacture its own safe version of every chip in every piece of equipment.”
“The Pentagon is now caught in a bind. It likes the cheap, cutting-edge devices emerging from commercial foundries and the regular leaps in IC performance the commercial sector is known for. But with those improvements comes the potential for sabotage. “The economy is globalized, but defense is not globalized,” says Coleman. “How do you reconcile the two?”
Rumors of the French installing backdoors and kill switches in all military equipment for sale to outside countries have been circulating since the 1980′s… The Falklands War and The USS Stark Incident provided plenty of fodder for theories that persist to this day.
The U.S. used a printer to deliver a knockout blow to Iraq before the 1991 War… New U.S. Currency contains symbols that alerts software apparently already in your computer, scanner and printer not to make copies of money… What else is embedded into your equipment that you don’t know about? Could a scenario similar to Stephen King’s “Cell” be less than unthinkable?… After all… Nearly all cell phones are assembled in a country that is technically an ideological enemy of the U.S..
10 Rules For Dating My Daughter…
This Man Is My Hero!.. Somebody Get Me His Address… I Want To Send Him Money!
PRINT THIS AND HAND IT OUT TO ALL OF THE FINE YOUNG MEN WHO COME CALLING
Copyright 1998 W. Bruce Cameron
Please do not remove the copyright from this essay
When I was in high school I used to be terrified of my girlfriend’s father, who I believe suspected me of wanting to place my hands on his daughter’s chest. He would open the door and immediately affect a good-naturedly murderous expression, holding out a handshake that, when gripped, felt like it could squeeze carbon into diamonds.
Now, years later, it is my turn to be the dad. Remembering how unfairly persecuted I felt when I would pick up my dates, I do my best to make my daughter’s suitors feel even worse. My motto: wilt them in the living room and they’ll stay wilted all night.
“So,” I’ll call out jovially. “I see you have your nose pierced. Is that because you’re stupid, or did you merely want to APPEAR stupid?”
As a dad, I have some basic rules, which I have carved into two stone tablets that I have on display in my living room.
Rule One:
If you pull into my driveway and honk you’d better be delivering a package, because you’re sure not picking anything up.
Rule Two:
You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter’s body, I will remove them.
Rule Three:
I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don’t take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, In order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.
Rule Four:
I’m sure you’ve been told that in today’s world, sex without utilizing a “barrier method” of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate: when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.
Rule Five:
In order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is “early”
Rule Six:
I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.
Rule Seven:
As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don’t you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?
Rule Eight:
The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter:
- Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool.
- Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight.
- Places where there is darkness.
- Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness.
- Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka zipped up to her throat.
- Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which feature chainsaws are okay.
- Hockey games are okay.
- Old folks homes are better.
Rule Nine:
Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help you God. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.
Rule Ten:
Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy outside of Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car-there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.
What Do You See?
You saw a couple in an intimate love position, right?
Interestingly, research has shown that young children cannot identify the intimate couple because they do not have prior memory associated with such a scenario.
What they will see, however, is nine (small & black) dolphins in the picture!
So, I guess we’ve already proven you’re not a young innocent child.
Now… if it’s hard for you to find the dolphins within 6 seconds, your mind is SO corrupted that you probably need help!
OK, here’s help: look at the space between her right arm and her head, the tail is on her neck, follow it up. Look at her left hip, follow the shaded part down, it’s another one, and on his shoulder..
Cool Pics, Jokes, Just Plain Silly | TheFourEyes May 3, 2008 |
Comments (0)
Memo – From Women To Men…
1. The reason why our bras don’t always match our underwear is because WE actually change our underwear.
2. The next time you and your buddies joke about armed women in combat, take a poll to see which of you successfully aim at the toilet rim.
3. If we’re watching football with you–it’s not bonding–it’s their butts.
4. Whenever possible, please try to say whatever you have to say after the movie.
5. Lay off the beans several hours before bedtime.
6. Please don’t drive when you’re not driving.
7. If you were really looking for an honest answer, you wouldn’t ask in bed.
8. The next time you joke about female drivers, research the number of accidents caused by rubber-necking mini-skirts.
9. If only women gossip, how do you and your friends keep track of “who’s easy”?
10. Stop telling us most male strippers are gay: we don’t care.
11. When you’re not around, I belch loudly, too.
12. We don’t mind if you look in the mirror to check your appearance — in fact — please do !!!
13. When you’re out with us, please wear “our” favorite outfit rather than “yours” — the torn jeans and dirty T-Shirt will last longer that way.
14. If you must grunt in reply, please develop a system to indicate a positive vs a negative grunt.
15. Don’t insist that we “get off the stupid phone” and then not talk to us.
16. Eye contact is best established above our shoulder-level.
17. Cleaning the house is not necessarily “women’s work”; besides, most of the “dirt” and clutter is yours anyway.
18. Yes, we know most of the great chefs are men, why is it then you never want to cook?
19. We go to the Ladies Room in groups to talk about you.
20. Yes, we know you can probably beat us arm wrestling; however, very few raises or promotions were gained by arm wrestling the boss.
