Some Interesting Internet Warning Signs… USE ‘EM !!
AND THE EVER POPULAR!!!
AND THE EVER POPULAR!!!
The Sea Organ is is a natural musical instrument, seventy meters long with thirty-five organ pipes built under the concrete. The musical pipes are located so that the sea water and wind movements produce musical sounds that are heard by passers by so that it achieves a communication with nature and promotes a unity of architecture and environment. As sea forces and energies are unpredictable in terms of tides and winds, this organ offers never-ending concert of numerous musical variations in which the performer is nature itself.
Meet the world’s first sheep-hog … a pig with its own fleece. Scientists are baffled by the strange swine … which they say is a pig at heart… but with a woolly hide.
The one-year-old is being raised on a ranch near the town of Esquina, 400 miles north of Buenos Aires, Argentina.
It is a pig but has a thick fleece which needs shearing in summer with the other sheep because it suffers in the heat. Other pigs do not trust it.
In August 2007, many news organizations reported that redheads or “gingers,” as our British and Australian friends call them, would eventually become extinct. Other news outlets and blogs picked up the story, citing the “Oxford Hair Foundation” or “genetic scientists” who claimed that there would be no more redheads by as early as 2060
Bizarre fact #3863:
Did you know…
Half of all people who have ever smoked have now quit.
Bizarre fact #4415:
Did you know…
The escalator in the CNN Center in Atlanta, Georgia is the longest freestanding escalator in the world, rising 160 feet or approximately eight stories in height.
Bizarre fact #2938:
Did you know…
Corpses don’t decompose as fast as they used to because of all of the chemicals and additives we eat now.
Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
Ask your mom.
What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?
If we don’t get some support soon, people are going to think we’re nuts.
What does a 75 year old woman have between her breasts?
Her navel.
1. Ahhh… I see the fuck-up fairy has visited us again!
2. I don’t know what your problem is, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce.
3. How about never?.. Is never good for you?
4. I see you’ve set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
5. I’m really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
6. I’ll try being nicer if you’ll try being smarter.
THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER
REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED BY: Monday, Sept 24th, 2007
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THE CONTENTS,
CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM .
Class 1: How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays — Step by Step, with Slide Presentation. Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
Class 2: The Toilet Paper Roll — Does It Change Itself? Round Table Discussion. Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.
Class 3: Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?– Group Practice. Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.
Class 4: Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor — Pictures and Explanatory Graphics. Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.
Class 5: Dinner Dishes — Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink? — Examples on Video. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
Class 6: Loss Of Identity–Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other. — Help Line Support and Support Groups. Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM.
Class 7: Learning How To Find Things–Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming. Open Forum — Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.
Class 8: Health Watch–Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health. Graphics and Audio Tapes. Three nights — Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.
Class 9: Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost–Real Life Testimonials. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.
Class 10: Is It Genetically Possible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks? — Driving Simulations. 4 weeks, Saturday’s noon, 2 hours.
Class 11: Learning to Live–Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife. Online Classes and role-playing .– Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined.
Class 12: How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion — Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
Class 13: How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy–Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You’re Going To Be Late. Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered. — Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.
Class 14: The Stove/Oven–What It Is and How It Is Used.– Live Demonstration. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.
Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.
Google Inc. is bankrolling a $30 million out-of-this-world prize to the first private company that can safely land a robotic rover on the moon and beam back a gigabyte of images and video to Earth, the Internet search leader said Thursday…
If the competition produces a winner, it would prove a major boon to the emerging private spaceflight industry and mark the first time that a non-government entity has flown a lunar space probe.
Heavenbound: A scientific exploration of how we have come to believe in God.
In short, are we hard-wired to believe in God? And if we are, how and why did that happen?
God has always been a puzzle for Scott Atran. When he was 10 years old, he scrawled a plaintive message on the wall of his bedroom in Baltimore. “God exists, he wrote in black and orange paint, “or if he doesn’t, we’re in trouble… Atran has been struggling with questions about religion ever since. Wondering why he himself no longer believes in God and why so many other people, everywhere in the world, apparently do.
Hello – tall, dark and obnoxious! – unknown
If your brain was chocolate it wouldn’t fill an M&M. – Me!
You’re so dumb, your fingers and toes are numbered. – anonymous
If I were as ugly as you are, I wouldn’t say hello, I’d say boo! -anonymous
Oil prices finished above $80 a barrel for the first time Thursday and gasoline prices rose as refiners reported production problems after Hurricane Humberto hit Texas.
Oil first traded over $80 a barrel on Wednesday after the Energy Department reported declines in crude and gasoline inventories and a drop in refinery activity, but ended the day below that psychologically important mark.
On Thursday, Humberto added to the supply concerns by cutting power to several refineries in the Port Arthur, Texas, area. Another tropical system gaining strength in the Atlantic also supported prices.
This week, the chairman of the St. Petersburg, Florida, City Council was accused of having sex with his two adopted daughters and their nanny. And he could have been in real trouble, too, if it turned out the nanny was an illegal. But he got ahead of the story when he killed himself by sitting in the garage with the doors closed and the riding lawn mower on.
A US mother-of-three has invented a sex toy that connects to a vacuum cleaner to give an orgasm in just ten seconds.
Inventor Joanne Drysdale claims it can give multiple, back-to-back orgasms lasting up to a minute a time – and it does not even touch the skin.
The 49-year-old former toolmaker was cleaning her carpets when she came up with the idea for Vortex, which sells for £35 through lovehoney.co.uk.
At the time Joanne, from Utah, had not had sex for 15 years following her divorce.
The Foureyes says:
“If one of these shows up at my place… My house will be very , very , very clean.” “However… It is possible that my duties might get reduced to Lifter of Heavy Objects though” … Then again… If they make one of these for guys… I could be asleep before she finishes brushing her teeth.
HMMMMmmmm…
“All Men Are Created Equal” ”
“The Pursuit Of Happiness”
“Certain Inalienable Rights”
“I’ve noticed that everyone who is for abortion has already been born” – Ronald Reagan
“I married your mother because I wanted children, imagine my disappointment when you came along.” – Groucho Marx
“He does the work of three men: Larry, Curly & Moe” – Anon.
“Can I borrow your face for a few days? My ass is going on holiday.”- Anon
I’m still learning how to walk and am still having some pain issues from my little accident… Makes it a bit hard to focus on all the surrounding issues… I’m attempting to reboot and get pissed off about something other than my own little drama… Of Course… Large doses of Morphine and Demerol tend to cause the “I care about this issue” factor to ease up a bit too!
Hang Tight!
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